I can't believe it's been a decade since my grandma Sylvia passed away. Her passing was just before Yom Kippur and the funeral was the morning before the holiday began. For me, her Hebrew date of passing is forever etched in my mind. Erev Yom Kippur - Kol Nidre.
I wore the same lavender lace dress that Yom Kippur. The hardest and most beautiful Yom Kippur of my life.
You see, the best of the best are said to pass between Rosh HaShana and Yom Kippur and my Gd, Sylvia J. Neal was the best. She was brilliant and funny and kind and wise. Everything you would want in a best friend, a confidant, and for me... a grandmother.
For nearly 10 years of marriage and becoming a mother I have ached to talk to her, hear her advice, eat chocolate together.
As the sun was setting, I sang Avinu Malkainu to myself and my darling Siikwan came over and hugged me. We swayed and hugged and I started to cry.
Tears of years of memories of sitting in Temple Beth El on the high holidays. Children services with my mom and Miss Irene (my best friend's mom).
Tears of pain from this last year of hate, misunderstanding, and violence.
Tears of sorrow of those lost and those destined to the same fate.
Then suddenly tears of hope as I stroke my daughter's silky hair.
Avinu Malkainu, creator of Heaven and Earth.
Avinu Malkainu, creator of peace.
Grandma, if you have the ear of anyone on High...
May this year bring us all renewal, peace, harmony, good health, and understanding of the body and mind.
May we be sealed in the book of life for a year of love, peace, and compassion.
May your name, Sylvia J Neal, continue to be for a blessing and may anything good I've done be for the merit of the aliyah (elevation) of your neshama (soul).
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